How To Build Self Esteem After Rejection
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How To Build Self Esteem After Rejection

Building self esteem using these tools will restore health & wellness. How to use feelings to restore self worth.

How to build self esteem after rejection takes pre-planning before that event takes place. Rejection comes in many forms sometimes with little or no warning that can deeply affect self confidence and severely damage self respect unless preparations are in place.

Steps to know about self esteem

Little can be done to actually prepare for the devastation of self-worth yet just being aware can be a step in the right direction. Shock still sets in after rejection, but then reality will be known that happiness can and will return with feelings of self confidence restored. Having the beliefs that the healthy self can and will be returning adds to esteem building.

Relationships that lead back to self confidence and ones to avoid

Focusing on the positive, limit the negative feelings an individual has in any relationship.  Attitude has a huge impact on  having a clear vision of a way to a healthy self once again. Feelings of despair only breed low self esteem and also hinder the healing as well. Surrounding oneself with healthy and beneficial supportive people can be a distraction if only for short times while you are with them, but have a longer lasting effect as words and actions are recalled to lead toward good self esteem paths. At least for a short time research recommend limiting contact with people with low self esteem or condemning words.

Timeline for feelings of doubt to feel good once more and who should be included

Stuffing feelings are harmful to health & wellness so let the annoyance and sadness be vented in proper places. Unloading your most vulnerable times might be best given to professionals rather than friends or relatives. Those important people in your life already share the pain of your injured self esteem so talking without monitoring your statements first will not help you or them. If you must, weigh and limit the pain of your self worth with people you care the most about in life.

Directives to happiness

If you determine to solicit professional counseling you might very well be given facts of how to rebuild high self esteem using specific techniques in these ways.

1.  Don't play the blame game. Partnerships, relationships and promises that were once sacred have been breached. When you ask if blaming will change the outcome, the answer will be no, so be aware and don't blame lack of self esteem on anyone or yourself.

2.  Collect some 3X5 cards and anytime you think of negatives, replace it with a written positive on the card to refer back to when low self esteem creeps back in your life.

3.  List as many good attributes you possess as you can place on the laptop, notebook or writing pad. Add to them anytime you think of your wonderful feelings, relationship characteristics or great points about yourself.

4.  Devote yourself to recognizing high self esteem. Start one day by telling yourself one good thing three times a day. Next day increase it by 2 and so on with each day building that low self esteem back to where you feel good about yourself.

5.  Keep track of your goals you have accomplished the ways you have discovered to build self esteem after rejection. Set some new goals after each goal has been met. 

6.  Rediscover the good feelings of you by revisiting hobbies or activities you enjoy doing.

7.  Exercise your low self esteem away with a walk, bicycle ride, a swim or other body exercises.

8.  Dress the part of successful accomplishments of self respect building by wearing clothing that gives you a boost. Use facial expressions that make you feel good too.

9.  Give a feel good compliment to someone who deserves your accolade. Meaningful compliments to others will give you self worth feelings when you view the results you give out. 

10. Forgive the person who rejected you, but more importantly forgive yourself so there is room for building your self esteem after rejection.

Photograph is Minnesota fuschia depicting beautiful new growth when self esteem is restored. Courtesy Roberta Baxter

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Comments (18)

Great article on how to build self esteem after being rejected. Voted up.

Ranked #2 in Psychology

important article, important to get the word out

Sound advice here Roberta. Low self esteem can indeed destroy one's confidence in everything.

Many people really need this at some point in life. I have needed it and this is really sound, good advice. Thanks for sharing.

This is wise advice. Most of us have suffered from rejection of one kind or another.

Another winning article from a winner. Great work, Roberta. I am so happy you write for this site.

Jenny Heart

Wise words from a wise women. Excellent!

Ranked #17 in Psychology

Very well written prolific article.

just dropping by to vote up your wonderful article.

Wonderful article and words that are wise and to the point on how to build self esteem. +1

Oh've done it again! Another truly great article, and one that we all need to read and take to heart. You have so many spot-on points that I don't know which to highlight. One thing that stands out toward the end though is your #9, that of "giving others a feel-good compliment." What wonderful advice. You always feel good about yourself when you've made someone else feel good. And, it certainly does make you hold your head up a little higher to do this because you ARE a valuable person who has something to give to othersl in this world. Awesome article. Voting it up and promoting it too. Thanks so much for writing this well put-together article chocked with so much wisdom.

This is great advice! Thanks for sharing.

Hi SisterFriend: You insist in cranking-out the most fascinating articles! Voted up.

Great advice. Will bear in mind.

keeping track of your goal would be one of the most important things you should to rebuild a shattered self esteem after rejection. Promoted since I'm out of votes.

I have gone through rejection, wish I had read it when I was 20, loads of good advice, applicable to all ages. voted and tweeted and dugg

Another excellent article that is filled with excellent advice. This is a great article that will truly help people that are feeling rejected and that need help with a pick up. Well done. Voted up.

The more i read this article, the more i realize how important it is.